I’m sorry, but you don’t deserve my love anymore.

Call me when you’ve grown up enough to handle me.

Slugs and fishes,

The Cookymunchkin

Last night, I was stuck in a stairwell at work, waiting for a tornado to rip the roof off the building.

So instead of cowering in a corner and crying, I decided to be a bit more constructive with my time…  So here is a recipe for a little something I whipped up that morning.  And let me tell you, it was GOOD.

Vegetable Couscous

Ingredients:

• 1 zucchini, chopped
• 1 yellow squash, chopped
• 1 onion, chopped
• 1-2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 red bell pepper, chopped
• 1 yellow bell pepper, chopped
• 1 cup sliced mushrooms
• 1-3 carrots, chopped
• 1 can garbanzo beans, drained
• 1 can diced tomatoes, drained
• 1 tbsp tomato paste
• A handful of golden raisins
• 1 tsp cinnamon
• 1 tsp paprika
• 2 tsp Garam masala
• 1-2 tbsp cardamom
• 1/4 c white wine or vodka
• Salt, pepper
• Olive oil
• 1 cup couscous, uncooked
• 2 c vegetable stock
• zest and juice from 1 orange

Directions:

1. Sauté onion, garlic, and other chopped vegetables in olive oil for 5 minutes.
2. Add garbanzos, tomatoes, tomato paste, raisins, and spices.
3. Add alcoholic beverage of your choice.
4. Simmer for 10 minutes.
5. Add the orange juice.
6. In another cooking vessel, boil vegetable stock. If you want to get all fancypants, you can even add a small pinch of saffron… Add a bit of olive oil, then add couscous. Cover and simmer for 5 minutes. Fluff with fork.
7. Serve veggies over couscous.
8. Garnish with orange zest.
9. And feel the Yum.

(If you would like a more traditional recipe for 7 vegetable couscous, you can find it HERE.)

Today we will be making a lovely seared teriyaki tuna steak and serving it over a salad that is dressed with a sesame-ginger vinaigrette.  And to keep it super classy, we’re even adding pineapples!  Yeah!

So here is what you need:

For the tuna steaks:

• 2-4 tuna steaks (You can cut them in half if the steaks are huge.)
• 1 small can pineapple rings, drained

• 1/4 cup soy sauce
• 1 Tbs mirin
• 1 tsp superfine sugar
• OPTIONAL:  1-2 Tbs sake

For the salad:

• Bag-O-Salad, and/or salad mixture of your choice
• 4 Tbs. canola oil
• 2 tsp grated fresh ginger, or 1 tsp dried ground ginger (ginger keeps in the freezer really, REALLY well…)
• 1 tsp toasted sesame seeds
• 1/2 tsp dark sesame oil
• 2 Tbs. honey
• 2 Tbs. soy sauce
• 2 Tbs. rice wine vinegar

Directions – tuna:

1. Mix together the soy sauce, mirin, sugar, and sake.
2. Marinate the tuna steaks for at least an hour.
3. Remove the tuna from the marinade, and reserve the marinade.
4. In an oiled skillet over medium-high heat, sear the tuna, about 2 minutes on each side.
5. Remove the tuna when done, and add pineapple rings to the pan.
6. Pour in the rest of the marinade, and reduce.
7. Turn over pineapples to caramelize each side.  Yum!

Directions – salad:

1. Mix together the salad dressing ingredients listed above.  Whisk or shake well to emulsify.
2. Pour dressing over salad mixture and toss.
3. Divide into individual servings.
4. Top with tuna and pineapple rings.
5. Drizzle with leftover marinade from pan.
6. Enjoy!

On to the recipe…

INGREDIENTS:

• 2 cups potatoes (can use instant, but this should be about 2-4 potatoes), roughly chopped
• 2 tbsp Butter
• 3-4 cloves garlic
• 1-2 sprigs fresh, or 1 tsp dried rosemary (If using fresh rosemary, chop it up finely.)
• ½ cup milk, ¾ cup sour cream, or 4 oz (light) cream cheese
• ¾ cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese

• 1 lb ground meat of your choice
• 1 onion, diced
• 4 cups frozen mixed veggies
• ¾ cup beef or chicken broth OR 1 cup beef gravy
• 2 Tbsp ketchup or tomato paste
• 3-4 sprigs fresh thyme (de-stemmed), or 1 tsp dried thyme
• ½ tsp nutmeg
• ½ tsp garlic powder
• Paprika for sprinkling
• 1-2 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
• salt and pepper to taste
• OPTIONAL:  sliced mushrooms
• OPTIONAL:  ½ cup red or white wine

DIRECTIONS:

• Preheat your oven to 375.
• Cook potatoes in boiling water until tender, about 15-20 minutes.
• In the meantime, sauté 2 cloves garlic and 1-2 chopped sprigfuls of rosemary in butter.

• Drain potatoes.  Add dairy products of your choice and butter mixture.

• Mash the potatoes, and set aside.

• Brown meat, 1-2 cloves garlic, and onions.  Drain meat.
• Add veggies and cook until they are thawed.

• If you are using wine, add wine and reduce for a few minutes.
• Add broth or beef gravy.

• Add the rest of the herbs and spices, along with the ketchup/tomato paste and Worcestershire sauce.  Stir well.  Cook for 5 more minutes.
• Spoon meat mixture into a casserole dish.  Cover with potatoes.

• Bake for 15-18 minutes.
• Add cheese to the top of the casserole, sprinkle with paprika, and bake for 2-5 minutes more (or until the cheese melts.)

Makes 6-8 servings

Enjoy!

And after some heavy wheeling, dealing, and discounting, I left the store with THIS:

Squee!!!!

So for my inaugural dish in this puppy, I knew I had to do something extra super special and yumtastically tasty!

So, what could I cook that required a huge pan and was a huge pain in the butt to make…???

Arroz Con Pollo!

Yay!

Here are the ingredients:

• 1- 3 1/2-4 lb chicken, cut into 8 pieces (or 3 1/2 lbs chicken parts of your choosing)
• 2-3 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 1 large red bell pepper, diced
• 4-5 garlic cloves, minced
• 2 tablespoons paprika
• 1/2 tsp white pepper
• 1 tsp dried oregano
• 1 tsp dried cumin
• 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes.  (Yes, mine is in a packet from a pizza place.  What, you don’t collect these too?  Why not?)
• salt and pepper, to taste
• 2 cups long-grain white rice
• 1 1/4 cup dry white wine*
• 1 14-oz can diced tomatoes, with juice
• 1 3/4 cups chicken broth*
• 3/4 tsp crumbled saffron threads
• 1 cup frozen peas
• 1/2 cup pimiento-stuffed green olives, chopped

*The liquid in this dish should total 3 cups.  So you can use 3 cups chicken broth, or alter the quantities of wine and broth to total 3 cups.  One recipe I saw even used beer for the liquid part!  So the choice is yours…

Directions:

• Preheat your oven to 350.
• Rinse your chicken really, really well.
• If necessary, cut up your whole chicken into 8 pieces….  Oh, you don’t know how?  Well here’s a video just for you!

Now, wasn’t that easy?

• Season the chicken with salt and pepper.
• Heat the olive oil in the pan, and add the chicken.

• Cook the chicken until it is golden brown on all sides, about 6-8 minutes total.

Your chicken should be browner than this. Just remember that it's not going to get any browner in the oven, and cook accordingly.

• When the chicken is browned to your liking, transfer it to a plate for later.
• Add the onion, garlic, and bell pepper to the pan.

• Reduce heat to medium and saute for about 5 minutes.
• Add paprika and wine.  Boil for 2 minutes.

• Add saffron and rice and cook, stirring, for 1 minute.

• Stir in the broth, white pepper, cumin, red pepper flakes, and oregano and bring to a simmer.

• Return the chicken and any juices to the pan.

Your chicken should probably be browner than mine, but after 45 minutes in the oven, it will no longer be hazardous to your health. I promise!

• Cover the pan, put in the oven, and bake for 45 minutes.
• After 45 minutes, remove from the oven, and stir in the tomatoes, olives, and frozen peas.  (My olives were left whole.  BIG mistake.  If you chop them up a bit, the flavor will be more subtle in the dish and not quite so, um…shocking? when you eat them.)

• After stirring in those ingredients, return the pan to the oven and bake for another 15 minutes.  (If you take out the pan and the liquid has already been absorbed, you can add another 1/2 cup or so of liquid if you want.)
• After 15 minutes, you should get something like THIS:

Enjoy!

Today we’re going to make more comfort food!  Yay!

This is a pretty basic recipe for macaroni and cheese, zhoozhed up a bit courtesy of Alton Brown and Williams-Sonoma…

On with the show…

Ingredients

• 1/2 pound elbow macaroni.  (Use Dreamfield’s if you’re feeling low-carby.)
• 3 tablespoons butter
• 3 tablespoons flour
• 1 tablespoon powdered mustard
• 3 cups milk
• 1/2 cup yellow onion, finely diced
• 1 bay leaf
• 1/2 teaspoon paprika
• nutmeg, to taste
• 2 cups sharp cheddar, shredded  (use white cheddar if you’re feeling saucy.  Or you can throw in some Fontina, smoked gouda, Gruyere, or any other interesting cheese that haz a flavor.)
• 1 teaspoon kosher salt
• White pepper

Topping:

• 3 tablespoons butter
• 1 cup (panko) bread crumbs  (If you don’t have panko, you can grind up some stale white bread in your food processor.)

Directions

Preheat oven to 350F.

In a large pot of boiling, salted water cook the pasta to one minute less than the directions say.  (It will finish cooking in the oven.)

While the pasta is cooking, in a separate pot, melt the butter. Whisk in the flour and mustard and keep it moving for about five minutes. Make sure it’s free of lumps. Stir in the milk, onion, bay leaf, nutmeg, and paprika. Simmer for ten minutes, stirring constantly, then remove the bay leaf.  (The bay leaf is optional, BTW.)

Stir in 3/4 of the cheese. Season with salt and white pepper. Fold the macaroni into the mix and pour into a 2-quart casserole dish. Top with remaining cheese.

Melt the butter in a saute pan and toss the bread crumbs to coat. Top the macaroni with the bread crumbs. Bake for 30-40 minutes.

Today we will be making a dish whose name confounds most Yankees:   Chicken Fried Chicken!  Yee Haw!

To make this, you will need:

• 2-4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
• flour
• an egg or two
• salt
• pepper
• cayenne pepper
• garlic powder
• oil or shortening for frying
• 1 pkg PIONEER GRAVY(!!!!)

Directions:

• If you want to shorten the cooking time, put each chicken breast into a ziploc bag and pound it to 1/2″ thickness with a meat mallet.  But this is entirely optional…
• Mix flour, salt, pepper, cayenne, and garlic powder, and put into a dredging receptacle.
• Beat eggs in a bowl that is big enough to accommodate the chicken breasts.

• Heat oil to 350-375 degrees.
• Dredge each piece of chicken in flour, then egg, then flour.  Make sure the entire thing is coated.

• Fry at medium-high heat, turning frequently, until brown.  After that, lower the heat a bit, cover, and cook for another 15-20 minutes, turning frequently to avoid burning the crust.

• If needed, you can keep the cooked chicken in your oven at 175-200 while you make the rest of the food.
• Make the Pioneer Gravy according to directions on the package.  (Yes, this is totally cheating.  But if you have ever tasted this stuff, you know that it tastes EXACTLY like the gravy that they use for chicken fingers at Whataburger.  And I wouldn’t lie to you about something as important as gravy…  So use it!)
• Ladle gravy over chicken and EAT!

I have the recipe for their soup, but I have tweaked it, and I daresay that mine is even BETTER.  For reals.  (Be sure and eat the soup with a sourdough baguette!  The bread really makes this dish pop!)

So, here is my redone recipe for The Grape’s Mushroom Soup.

Don’t say I never gave you anything.

Ingredients:

• 6 tbs butter
• 2 shallots, finely chopped
• 3,  8-oz packages of various mushrooms, chopped.  I like to use button, shiitake, and crimini.  (And throw in some oyster mushrooms if I can find them!)
• 3 tbsp all-purpose flour
• 4 cups of beef stock
• 1/2 cup white wine
• pinch of white pepper
• pinch of nutmeg
• 1.5 cups heavy cream

Directions:

1. Melt butter in large saucepan.
2. Add shallots and cook over moderate heat until they become translucent.
3. Add mushrooms and cook 5 minutes more, stirring occasionally.
4. Stir in flour and coat vegetables well.
5. Add white wine and cook for a minute or so, scraping the bottom of the pot.
6. Add stock slowly, stirring constantly.
7. Bring mixture to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer 5 minutes.
8. Add white pepper & nutmeg.
9. Remove from heat, stir in cream, and serve.

Serves 6.

If you serve this with a baguette of sourdough bread and a glass of red wine, you will be adored forever.  Ladies, this soup is a MAN TRAP.  I kid you not.  How else do you think I snagged my husband???  It’s THAT good!

Enjoy!

For this post, I thought I’d give you a few of my favorite recipes.  These are great for giving as Christmas gifts, and they’re super easy to make, too!

Today we’ll be making Peppermint Bark, Chocolate-covered Apricots, and Rum/Bourbon balls!

Peppermint Bark

This stuff is so easy that I’d trust any of my sister’s kids to make it.  At my house, even.  Seriously.

Ingredients:

• 8 ounces high-quality semisweet chocolate chips
• 2 teaspoons canola oil, divided (Optional)
• 1/2 teaspoon peppermint extract, divided (Optional)
• 8 ounces high-quality white chocolate chips
• crushed peppermint candy

Chocolate Covered Apricots

These are super fun to make.  And you can be all artsy with the dipping!  Express  yourself through apricots!

Ingredients:

• Dried apricots
• white chocolate chips
• semisweet chocolate chips

Directions:

• Melt each kind of chocolate, separately, in a double boiler or microwave.  (If microwaving, cook in 30 second intervals, stirring after each interval.)
• Dip half of the apricots in white chocolate and place onto waxed paper or parchment paper to cool
• Dip the other half of the apricots in the semisweet chocolate and place onto waxed/parchment paper to cool.
• Dip a fork or spoon into the leftover white chocolate, and use it to drizzle streaks onto the dark-chocolate-covered apricots.
• Dip a fork or spoon into the leftover dark chocolate, and use it to drizzle streaks onto the white-chocolate-covered apricots.
• When chocolate hardens, store the apricots in a tightly sealed container in a cool place.

Rum/Bourbon Balls

These are seriously everyone’s favorite thing at Christmas.  Make a batch for your Granny and watch her get tipsy!  (That’s when the really interesting stories come out!)  Yay!

Ingredients:

• 2 cups crushed vanilla wafers
• 1 cup confectioner’s sugar
• 1 cup chopped walnuts or pecans
• 2 Tbsp unsweetened cocoa powder
• 2 Tbsp light corn syrup or honey
• 1/4 cup bourbon, or 1/2 cup rum
• additional confectioner’s sugar (or nuts, or shredded coconut or cocoa powder)

Directions:

• Pulverize the vanilla wafers in your food processor.  Or use a rolling pin.
• Mix crushed wafers, confectioner’s sugar, nuts, cocoa powder, corn syrup, and liquor together until well-blended
• Mixture should be moist, not soggy.
• Roll dough by approximate teaspoonfuls into small balls
• Roll in additional confectioner’s sugar (or nuts or coconut or cocoa powder)
• Store in tightly covered container in a cool place.

I hope you enjoy these recipes, and I hope you have a very Merry Christmas!

I was at World Market and picked up a mini version of Spanish chorizo.  And I had some scrimps sitting in my freezer at home.  So I decided to make this little concoction…

Penne with Shrimp, Chorizo, and Asiago cheese!

Ingredients:

• 10-12 shrimp (Mine were in a bag in my freezer.  Feel free to use fresh ones.)
• 2 1/4 cups heavy cream
• 1 cup grated Asiago Cheese
• 2 tablespoons butter or olive oil
• 1/2 cup chopped Spanish chorizo  (You can use Mexican chorizo if you want, but it will just fall apart and get runny and gross.  So whatever floats yer boat…)
• 1 tablespoon chopped garlic
• 3/4 cup peas
• 1 box Penne pasta
• 3/4 cup white wine

Directions:

• While you are making the sauce, cook the penne according to directions on package.
• Save yourself some time and dishwashing by throwing the peas into the water with the penne.
• When penne is done, set aside.

• In a nonstick frying pan, fry the shrimp until they are done.  Or just follow the cooking directions on the bag of frozen shrimp.
• Remove shrimp and set aside.  (And remove the extraneous sauce matter from the pan, if your shrimp came in a bag.

• In the same pan, add the chopped chorizo and garlic (and a little oil, if you think it will stick.  It probably won’t, but still…)
• Cook until crunchy and brown.

• Add the white wine and reduce until it looks something like this:

• Add the heavy cream and reduce until the sauce is thick.
• Then add cheese.

• Then add drained pasta and peas….

• Mix it all together…

• Plate it up, and add some Parmesan or something if you want….

YUM!

Oh, by the way, how do you like my snazzy new apron that I got in N’Awlins?

It’s so Me, don’t you think?  =-D